My photo-safari to Atlas Park

Hey there all you Mayhem lovers.
I just got back from Atlas park and I have to say I had a ball.

But hey, dont just take my word for it. Here, look at these snaps I caught on my cam-drone and take the ride with me:

Basically after I'd cracked enough faces Mikey said I had to do one last thing to prove myself.
He had some inside on a way to slip right into the heart of Atlas and he wanted me to make a little withdrawal for him.
The thought of finally getting in on some of these "contacts" he was said to be holding was pretty promising, but I didn't like the fact that I'd be risking my butt for this rattface bastich. Still he was the one with the cards so off I went.

Turns out "someone" had let slip I was coming as the first thing I ran into when I got to atlas was a police blockade. And once I got to wailing on their sorry hides the Spandex Junior Division even came out to play.

I got a little carried away maybe and made a bit of a mess. Hell, might as well leave a calling card right? Well my calling card says "Carnage" with a capital "whupass"

So after wading through a handful of Paragons finest* (*with the exception of anyone else who actually know what the hell they're doing), here I am, finally, at the bank

Even though the little girls in red and white were alarmed I guess noone bothered to tell John Q Public I was coming. Probably that whole "dont want to cause a panic" schpieel

Needless to say... panic ensued

Not that I mind whacking around anyone that gets in my way, but I was saving my enthusiasm for guys like this. They sure dont teach common sense at PPA

I mean come on... just what was one lone copper going to do? Splash saltwater on me and hope the armour rusts?

That guy packed a bit more punch. Guess he's one of the people actually worth his pay. I even had to smack him around a bit just to get him to stand still for the pictures.

As you see I got tired of playing around and just broke him in the end before moving onto the vault. Getting to the vault wasn't that hard...

And the vault door itself isn't much of a problem either with dual "Solar Flare" Watchins Neural Feedback 2kx-3100 Battle Gauntlets fitted. Hey I wonder if I can get endorsements for this?

Aahh.... aint that a sight for sore eyes? Bucking coppers about is fun, sure, but ya gotta love loot no matter what.

Turns out PPD and the red-white girlscouts had finally gotten into their thick heads that they weren't a match for me. So what do they do? That's right, they call someone ELSE in who isn't a match for me either.

Now this No Mind guy... he packs an ok wallop...

Too bad he can't take it as well as he dishes it out

So with him in a wheel chair I was off back to Port Oakes. Mikey got his money and I got a phone number. Hell, Mikey even "offered" me a bonus cut of 20% of the loot after I dragged him down an alley and did a bit of "negotiation". Don't worry Mikeydolls, cheekbones heal in no time!

As luck would have it, it was just the right time to come into money. It wasn't more than half an hour later till a friend of mine on the black market called me up and told me about a new shipment he'd gotten in.

Only snag was I had to go back to Atlas to pick it up. Lucky me that Mikey didn't mind me borrowing his boat again (at least I dont think he will...) and getting back home wasn't much of a problem once I had the hardware:

It's good to be king....!

Current threat level: Numbskulls finally got around to upping it to 8. I guess smacking about the spandex-dragshow impresses the bigwigs

Current mood: Grumpy. Perfect for a fight

Jumping the shark

So there I was! Alone in the nicaraguan jungle, surrounded by killer robots and ninja hamsters...

wait no... that's not what I was going to talk about. This is supposed to be how a 20'000$ job can be a "bad thing" right?

Well Frosty and me we set off for Sharkhead for the rendevouz point (ever notice how everyone pronounces it "run-day-voos" or "run-day-view" instead of "run-day-vu"?) and there we were met by this weird robot chick.

Now I use both the terms "robot" and "chick" in the loosest possible sense here. Maybe it was a chick in an armour. Maybe it was a robot that looked slightly female. Maybe it was a can of tuna and the maid slipped LSD into my oreos again. What the hell do I care, she freaked me out just the same? Sure thing was... she was the one footing the tab. And she did it the way I like it. 20 Grand, cash in hand and we were ready to get rolling. She even promised to double it up once the target was bagged.

Now, she wasn't relying on JUST Frosty and me for backup. She'd brought in a couple of other "free market prospecteers" (which is fancy-speak for "hired facecrackers" like me). All in all I think there was 6 of us (if I seem a bit fuzzy on a few of the details, it's because I got knocked on the head one or two times, more on that later).

Even this team wasn't enough as the bot-girl-thingy had arranged for more backup. Bots. Real, built to effect, state of the art combat robotry.

And I'm not talking layoff 80's Tac-3 style bots. These things were state of the art. Latest upgrades. And they were brimming with weapons. Like something out of one of them damn jappo cartoons.

See that? That's me in the middle of them. Pretty freaking nice looking huh? No not her ass, it's probably full of wiring. I'm talking about the hardware ya geek bastich!

Anyway the deal going down was getting ahold of this "Essence of the Leviathan" or something.

THE PLAN:

Take out the power fonts

Knock around the "shaper" who's supposed to be the guy running the place.

Take the essence and get the hell out of dodge.

Now that doesn't sound so bad does it? So how did it go?

Well.... long story short:

Yeah that's me chewing dirt. For those of you wanting the longer version here goes:

First off we go in there... no guards which is always a bad sign when you're supposed to be going for something worthwhile.

Ever seen a tornad0? Those twisty things of pure wind-force that tear buildings to shreds and chuck buicks halfway across counties? I always kinda reckoned myself related to those.

The kinship wasn't mutual it seems. That's right, those damn caves were full of twisters. Not the huge citywreckers of course... but big enough to leave several dents in the carvern walls shaped like yours truly's backside. Now, getting to the fonts while getting knocked around like pinballs was tricky enough. Then came the fighting.

Turns out the "fonts of power" weren't just the hokus pokus version of a generator installation. These things were alive, even though the just looked like big columns of light. And even worse... they get in your head.

Now, while most would probably get freaked out digging around my head, these things didn't seem to be all to bothered. Then again what they did was less a "spying in your head" and more "psychic sledgehammer to the noggin".

So we fought. We bled. We had a helluva time. And eventually we broke the things.

However, we didn't do so completely unnoticed. So suddenly the shaper was on us. He was some kind of freaky squid-headded goon. And apparently a magicer like Frosty. He had all these bodyguards made of rock. Well... the coral of the caves was what the others said, but I say a rock is a rock. So we took a hammering. If we thought we had it hard with those powerthings this was a whole different ballgame.

And speaking of ballgames. Guess how many of those damn twisters were in the cavern where we fought him? Well I didn't stop to count but more than 10 for sure. And that's when it got really freaky. Either he was controlling them, or they were more than just wind-twisters, because they seemed to actually seek us out and try to grab us.

We got him. It took long enough and we were all exhausted by the time he went down, but we did get him.

So we had the essence thing and were home free... or so we thought.

Recluse, the leader of the Arachnos boys, has these lieutenants. One of them is a mutant shark pirate. Styles himself "Captain Mako", but he's about as much captain as I am ballerina.

Anyway, apparently he's used this essence to make himself stronger and now he's all girly and pissy about anyone else getting ahold of it. Guess he feels his powerbase is threatened if anyone else gets on the same footing as him. So he showed up with some goons.

He basically kicked out faces in! Now we took out his goons soon enough and it was the 6 (I think) of use, plus all the heavy hitter hardware, against him. Seems pretty sure odds right?

Problem was, you dont always know what you're getting with muties. Just like Jackson back in Columbia this guy was a package and a half.

We beat him up good. Oh we pretty much turned him inside out but he just kept coming. Nothing we did would keep him down as he was closing up faster than we could rip him up. And the speed. Man! He was so fast I could hardly see where he was half the damn time, much less hit him.

To make the games even more fun he just had to go and have some hokus pokus on his own right? I mean being a psycho super fast regenerating shark freak wasn't enough? We were attacked by sharks.

That's right... I said sharks. We were in caves. On land. Not much water apart from the occasional puddles. And we were attacked by damn sharks. Ghost things I reckon, but what the hell do I know? Frosty said they were some kind of spirits of the essence, whatever that means.

Even so, none of us are kids and we take care of ourselves. He got as good as he's ever done and we almost had him a time or two but he seemed to be able to pull out a new trick each time.

A good soldier knows when it's time to fight another day. It's not something I like, but in the end we had to ditch the essence and just get the hell out of dodge. After all, I just got here, I'm not about to end up as chum just yet.

So no bonus, but still 20 grand richer. Of course repairs took half of that, but it's still a decent earning in a new market. Living expenses are through the roof though. When you're 7'8" and wear a suit of powered armour, apparently it takes a little extra to get an undisturbed place to sleep at night.

So now I'm rooming up at the harbour front of PO. I ditched Mercy. Burke said he had some work for this doctor Frankenstein fellow but five seconds with him made me want to wring his pencil neck.

Now I dont always love my employers. Hell I can't stand them most of the time. But this guy was off the chart. No was I was working for someone like that.

So I moved on. Burke says he'll have something more for me later on, but it's something with the arachnos and I need a rep for it.

So that brings me to Mickey. Ever heard of Mickey "the Ear"? He's got ears like Mickey freakin Mouse, both literally and figuratively. Anything that you say to him, you can be sure it's going directly to the highest bidder. And even if you didn't, he probably heard it anyway.

Still, Burke says if I do right by him, he'll do right by me and make some introductions. But first I need to prove myself.

I guess it's time to get off the intarwebs and start breaking some more faces....

Current Threat Level: Still 6, been busy with repairs

Current Mood: Dying to get back in the thick of it. Ocean-view gets boring after a while

Physical Status: Only pain left is me aching for a good fight

Current Music: Got the playback on the suit working again. I reckon some old classics like Sepultura will do nicely while I work.

How I got to the Rogue Isles or; What the heck am I doing in this dump?!

Choose a life.
Choose Paragon City.
Choose upgrades from legitimate manufacturers instead of third world armsdealers who'd just as soon cut you up and sell you as parts.
Choose the satisfaction of using your talents to help innocent people and make the world a better place.
Hell, in the end choose love.
Choose getting married to a nice sweet girl and settling down in a nice little house.
Choose having a few little ones.
Choose a good life.
Choose an easy life.
Choose being a hero in Paragon City....
.... but I chose something else....

Ever notice how bad things come in 3s? Yeah I know, clichéd to death. Well ever notice how the bad stuff comes wrapped up in a disguise of something good?
This time I made some mistakes. I guess that doc replaced parts of my brain with chunks of rock while he was operating or something. Anyway, leave the crying to the babies, at least life is more interesting like this.

Mistake number one:
So I didn't do my research and had bad timing. Seemed like a good job on the surface. Go to England and kidnap Justin Sinclair.

Just who is that? Well only the sole owner of "Sinclair Industries" and one of the wealthiest sons of bitches this side of Crey.

I heard he practiced some martial arts and was supposidly pretty hot at it. Not bothered at all. Doing your job in an 8 foot tall suit of armour will tend to make you less jumpy.

Rumour has it Sinclair was friends with some of those Paragon spandexos. Should have rung a bell right? Nah... brain. rocks. all that. I didn't check if any of them were in the country.

Enough to say Manticore is one tough hombre, I'll give him that. I'll also give him a fractured skull next time I see him.

So next step? yeah you guessed it.... the Zig. Which brings us nicely to

Mistake number two:
2 months inside the Zig is enough to make any man go nuts. They took my suit away and cut off all my non-vital implants. That sucked. So when suddenly the place's shaking, people are running around screaming and you hear explosions go off what do you do? That's right, stay in your damn cell. I didn't though. Just like a hundred other fools I made a break for it. Wasnt that hard, as the dampening on my implants shut off right after the second explosion. Damn that felt good. Didn't take me long to get hold of my suit after that. Damn that felt even better. Of course I had to break the heads of a few jackass "fellow inmates" along the way who thought they might get a good advantage from using my suit. Numbskulls. Anyone with two bits of know-how on the tech can tell you this kind of hardware is custom made. It'd take weeks to reset it to another user.

But Aaaanyway, you're probably thinking "how was this a mistake?". Well, you want to get out of prison. But at what cost? Turns out the people busting us out were Arachnos.

Now dont get me wrong. Adapting into an organised unit and taking on a spooky image to keep people jumpy is a smart strategy. But I dont buy into the whole "world domination" bull.

Anyway, I broke a few more heads and took their help getting out. Now I may have a head full of rocks, but even I could see where this was going. So I got to making some calls on the way.

Turns out I got lucky. Old friend of mine was doing business on Mercy and he wasn't all that jazzed about the spideys either.

Needless to say I made myself scarce soon as we got to the island.

Burke's a hell of a guy. He's the kind of guy you know would gut his own mother if the price is right. But he's also the guy you can trust to have your back so long as you dont fuck with him. And I'm not stupid enough to fuck with him.

SoI do a few jobs for him... just small fry. Recon this. "Acquire" (cough) that. Break those. Nothing out of the ordinary.

Except someone took notice.

Now I'm here. With no friends at all, bar one. On a group of islands populated by lunatic supers and wannabe conquerors. So I would probably call what I did next

Mistake number three:

I got this signal on my comm yesterday. Hadnt been on the island for more than a day and just finished doing some work for Burke with Frostie. Frostie's this freaky guy. He's like frozen solid and got this long fancyass japanese name that I'll never remember. So I call him Frosty, see? He's got some pretty nice tricks up his sleeve though. Says he's a demon of some kind, though I didn't really pay attention to that part.

Anyway this signal comes in. Now usually on comms people call you up like on a phone or send you a message. Kinda emaily. But this was different. This was hyper-dense. Which is kinda hard to explain but is basically data compressed and transmitted via sound. You can fit an encyclopedia into about a minute's worth of "bleep" it's pretty cool.

This comm had a place, a short job description (getting hold of some kind of Essence... pretty much the usual mystic mumbo jumbo for those magic guys. Frosty seemed to think it was pretty major mojo though) and a promise of 20 grand for us each.

So mistake number 3? Taking a job on the Isles without know who you're working for, who you'll be working with and what the hell you're doing.

Hell... that's why I love my job

Anyway, I'll get into exactly what happened next time as today I'll be repairing my armour and munching pain killers. Oh, and if anyone wants a cool necklace I have a few spare shark teeth.

For those of you who know your way around here's a little teaser though:

Current Threat Level: 6
Current Mood: Chilling
Physical Status: Battered and bruised
Current Music: people outside screaming as they get mugged. The whole audio playback of my suit got busted up.